Theolgical Perspective

My theology according to http://quizfarm.com/run.php/QuizRunner


You Scored as Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan

You are an evangelical in the Wesleyan tradition. You believe that God's grace enables you to choose to believe in him, even though you yourself are totally depraved. The gift of the Holy Spirit gives you assurance of your salvation, and he also enables you to live the life of obedience to which God has called us. You are influenced heavly by John Wesley and the Methodists.

Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan

93%

Neo orthodox

79%

Emergent/Postmodern

68%

Roman Catholic

57%

Charismatic/Pentecostal

50%

Classical Liberal

43%

Reformed Evangelical

36%

Modern Liberal

18%

Fundamentalist

11%

The Holy Church

I've been thinking for the past few weeks about the nature of the Church. Usually when I think about the nature of the Church, I am verbalizing historic affirmations such as the Apostle's Creed, "I believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy catholic church," or the Nicene Creed that there is "one, holy, catholic, apostolic church," or the opinion of the Reformers that the church is where the Word of God is proclaimed and the sacraments duly administered. Now, I think I somewhat understand how to articulate these expressions of the nature of the church, but that doesn't really do anything to help me really understand what this thing called the Church is really about.

When I think about my experience with the church it is often negative. I've met too many cranky, selfish, hypocritical people in the church that it is hard to overlook the bad apples. Of course, I've met amazing people, but the bad ones really stand out. I've also seen the church from the inside out. I understand the business of the church and what makes the local church run. The business meetings, the finance reports, the budget concerns. I heard one friend say that after he worked in the church he "saw how the sausage was really made, and it just didn't taste as good after that!"

When I think like this it is easy to start asking the question why. Why am I investing my life in this? Why am I spending my time and energy in a way that is often met with criticism and fear? Why spin my wheels like this?

The answer is because when it comes to the church, I am a hopeless optimist. I've heard someone say that when the church gets it right, it is like nothing that has ever existed. She is beautiful and radiant. She shows love and concern like nothing else. She is inclusive to the point that people who should never have come together now have deep relationship and concern for one another. She is also enduring. When she dies out in one place, she flourishes in another. She is always growing and always going. She is the refuge for both the vile and the saint. And I have tremendous hope for what she can become. The only hope I have for the world comes through her at the local level. And I am absolutely committed to investing my life in service of her, the beautiful bride of our Christ.

Theodicy

John 11:35 is, to me, one of the most profound statements in the Bible. John tells the story of how Jesus heard of his friend Lazarus who was sick and probably on his death bed. Strangely, he doesn't leave right away, and by the time he gets to Bethany Lazarus is dead. In fact, he's been dead for at least 4 days, because he was buried 4 days ago! If only Jesus had arrived earlier. After all, he is the miracle worker who has been healing people all through Palestine. If only he had left when he heard the news about Lazarus. If only... In our grief how many times have we asked ourself "if only?"

As Jesus arrives, he sees the family and his friends grieving for the loss of their friend Lazarus. He sees the crowds crying out in anguish and emotion as Lazarus lies in the tomb. Since he is a friend of Jesus, I imagine that Lazarus was around Jesus' age. Maybe they had known each other since boy hood. Maybe Lazarus left behind a wife and kids. Maybe his parents were still around and grieving the worse kind of grief, of a parent outliving their child.

Now that Jesus has arrived, you expect everything to be ok- except this time this is death! He is not healing someone. Can he bring someone back to life? As he looks around and sees his friends, maybe even his family, grieving and weeping. Jesus, the miracle worker, the fixer of problems, the One with answers suddenly does the unthinkable. John 11:35 says simply, "Jesus wept." End of sentence. No descriptor. Pointedly and suddenly, Jesus wept. He didn't cry. He didn't tear up. He wept. The one who brought forth all life wept!

Jesus' response to death is not to fix the problem. He doesn't run in and try to cheer everyone up. He is simply there. He is there in pain. He is there in sympathy. He doesn't offer a pithy statement, he weeps. He knows their pain. He knows their grief, and he allows it. He even endorses it. He weeps.

I can't explain pain. Theologically, we call this problem of pain theodicy. I have no idea why it happens. Now, I get that there is sin and because of sin there is death. I get that abstractly, but not personally. When I visit the hospital to see church members and I see cancer. I see children. I see families grieving. I don't get it. Why does it have to be this way? Why is there this problem of theodicy? Where is God?

Jesus wept.

I may not get why there is pain and death and sickness, but I do know that in the hospital room, in the funeral parlor, in the graveyard, in the loneliness of an empty house, Jesus weeps.

Thinking through death

Here some thoughts from the brilliant mind of Bishop N.T. Wright from his book Surprised by Hope. I'll add some of my own thoughts as well.

"From Plato to Hegel and beyond, some of the greatest philosophers declared that what you think about death, and life beyond it, is the key to thinking seriously about everything else- and indeed, that it provides one of the main reasons for thinking seriously about anything at all."

Paul wrote in 1 Thess, "we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep...we believe that Jesus died and rose again..." (4:13).

This is creedal statement forms the backbone of any Christian confession. At the heart of our life and theology is the simple confession, "Jesus died and rose again!" For Paul, this meant that it shaped his whole understanding of death and grief. And if it shapes our understanding of death, then surely it shapes our understanding of life as well. If our theology is only good when we are healthy and happy, then our theology is worthless. However, if our deepest beliefs are rooted in the valley of the shadow of death than surely this will impact the whole of our life.

religious pluralism

Here some thoughts from the brilliant mind of Bishop N.T. Wright from his book Surprised by Hope. I'll add some of my own thoughts as well.

on religious pluralism:

"Even a quick glance at the classic views of the major religious traditions gives the lie to the old idea that all religions are basically the same. There is a world of difference between the Muslim who believes that a Palestinian boy killed by Israeli solders goes straight to heaven and a Hindu from whom the rigorous outworking of karma means that one must return in a different body to pursue the next stage of one's destiny. There is a world of difference between the Orthodox Jew who believes that all the righteouss will be raised to new individual bodily life in the resurrection and the Buddhist who hopes after death to disappear like a drop in the ocean, losing one's own identity in the great nameless and formless Beyond."

This is an argument I love to engage. I think one of the greatest arguments against religious pluralism is this argument of the afterlife. Now by religious pluralism I am not talking about need for different religions to tolerate one another nor am I advocating an end to inter-religious dialogue. These are fine ambitions and should be embraced by anyone claiming religious or non-religious affiliations. However, there is a form of religious pluralism that essentially argues that all religious are basically the same with the same goal. This is an ill-informed position, that I call simply ignorant. To say to a Buddhist that his goal of Nirvana is the same as mine, which is a goal of bodily resurrection, is simply ignorant and frankly offensive to both the Buddhist and the Christian. If you are going to have an argument on religious universality, please think this one through.

Coldplay

I went to see Coldplay last night in Oklahoma City. This was my second Coldplay show, and it did not dissapoint. Viva La Vida has a very different sound than than the previous three, and especially different than X and Y. The X and Y tour was the most engaging two hours of my life. The sound and the media were brilliant. I stood there and watched a beautiful production. Viva La Vida was different, but still amazing.

The album has a more natural sound than X and Y, and consequently used a whole lot less media. Thats not to say the show was boring to look at. Their set started with a black veil that covered the stage as they played "Life in Technicolor." Then the veil fell and the lights came on and the background, which was previously black was the cover art for the album. The first song that really used any media was "Clocks," which still wasn't a whole lot- just some intelligent lights shining lazers back into the crowd and up the back wall of the Ford Center. The strangest media were some giant globes that fell out of the ceiling and then lit up with swirls of different colors and even projections of the band that was being shown on some projectors above.

The highlight was by far "Viva la Vida." The entire band went to a "satellite" stage more in the crowd and slowly that stage went dark and Chris stayed behind to play some piece that sounded almost classical. He brought the energy way down and then you heard Will start on the timpani. The crowd went crazy and the lights came on and everyone was sining, "I hear Jerusalem bells a rining/ Roman calvary choirs a singing." Amazing. Will even rang a big bell during the song as well. This show was definitively more about the music than the X and Y tour, but with this album they should focus on the music because there are some powerful songs on this one.

Now I would be remiss if I didn't mention the opener. Jon Hopkins who was mixing music and creating his sounds while matching it to a cartoon. I couldn't even begin to describe the images of the cartoon we were watching, so here is a post from YouTube.

Viva La Vida

Ok, I've got a theory on the meaning of the title track on Coldplay's new album. First, here are the lyrics. My commentary will be at the bottom.

I used to rule the world
Seas would rise when I gave the word
Now in the morning I sleep alone
Sweep the streets I used to own

I used to roll the dice
Feel the fear in my enemies eyes
Listen as the crowd would sing:
"Now the old king is dead! Long live the king!"

One minute I held the key
Next the walls were closed on me
And I discovered that my castles stand
Upon pillars of salt, and pillars of sand

(chorus)
I hear Jerusalem bells are ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field
For some reason I can not explain
Once you know there was never, never an honest word
That was when I ruled the world

It was the wicked and wild wind
Blew down the doors to let me in.
Shattered windows and the sound of drums
People could not believe what I'd become
Revolutionaries Wait
For my head on a silver plate
Just a puppet on a lonely string
Oh who would ever want to be king?

First, of all lets look at the album art


The album artwork, which is my least favorite of all the Coldplay albums is clearly a depiction of the French Revolution. If you google image "french revolution" this painting comes up. The French flag is waving over a bloody battlefield. I don't get the exposed breasts, but that is more a commentary on the art then the meaning of the song. So, with this odd album cover about the French Revolution, some of the context for this song is established. If you go through and read some of the verses, you can start to see how this is being told from the perspective of the overthrown King Louis XVI, who "used to rule the world." This powerful man is remembering how it was when he was in charge. He could give a word and see massive changes. I think this sufficiently explains the verses.

The chorus is a bit harder to explain. I think this is remembering another historical instance of great political upheaval. Connecting the "roman cavalry" and the Jerusalem bells can be hard, but it makes me wonder when were there times the bells in Jerusalem would have been ringing. Bells for us are happy sounds, but think about them more as air raid signals. One time the bells would have been ringing was when the Roman army destroyed Jerusalem in AD 70. Or there were times when Jerusalem was attacked by Christian "roman" armies in the crusades. These two options carry different significance.

Let's pretend it is the first option. The Jewish people had aligned themselves politically with Rome and enjoyed certain privileges that other ethnic groups did not enjoy- for instance, they did not have to worship the Caesar. Early Christians were shielded from much persecution because they were a Jewish sect. That is, until Jerusalem bells were ringing because of the Roman army. This is also when Christianity really began to spread, explaining the missionary statement.

If this is a valid explanation, why connect it to the French Revolution? At both of these times in history, these people experienced a fall from the heights. The Christians were protected before and then found themselves as martyrs, but continued to grow nonetheless. The French fell from power because their pride, and ended up at the bottom. The Christians fell, but found themselves powerful in a few generations.

This is the theme of this album. The powerful fall and the weak become strong. I believe this fits the rest of the album as well and Chris Martin's social justice emphasis.

Justice, part 2

Thinking about Justice in the Bible, for my sermon this week.

To begin, Justice is directly (and somewhat obviously) linked to God as judge. This is uncomfortable for most of us. One reason has been explored a little in the previous post. Another reason is that we have had the idea of God as judge stolen from hate-spewing preachers who claim every natural disaster, terrorist attack, and calamity as the hand of God. This is not a full view of the biblical notion of justice. As a result we then discard any notion of God seeking justice and judging the earth.

Let's explore some ways God is judge in the Bible:

Genesis 3 is probably the first instance of justice in the Bible. This is the story we all know of Adam and Eve who ate from the tree and rebelled against the command of God. I can't say I understand much of this story. I don't understand why this is considered sin. I don't know why God ever told them not to eat from the tree. All I know is that it sounds remarkably similar to my own story. I know the way I should be, and yet cannot seem to achieve this kind of life. The result, God speaks judgment on Adam and Eve. The judgment God speaks is essentially mortality. Christian theology, largely due to some words of Paul, and later articulated more clearly in Augustine called this the original sin. Now the guilt of this original sin taints all of us, even babies. One thing I learn from this story is that judgment is linked to the command of God, namely I learn that there are consequences to sin. And these consequences reach far beyond me, even to subsequent generations.

Exodus 14 is the story of the parting of the Red Sea. In this passage, the Egyptians are judged for holding the Hebrews in slavery for generations. The Egyptians experienced the ten plagues and now the "horse and the chariot are cast in the sea." God judges the Egyptians and the result is the salvation of the oppressed, the Hebrews.

Later in the Scripture, God judges the people of Judah by destroying the Temple and then sending them into captivity in a foreign land. How could a good God possibly judge the people in this way? They had been led into great apostasy and were in need of severe correction. The major objection most people will (and probably should) raise is how is God good and loving when he allows (and even ordains) destruction on people?

This leads us to the main judgment in the Scripture. I'm not talking about the final judgment. The final judgment pails in comparison to this judgment. All of humanity stands condemned just as Paul (and later Augustine) taught. We stand condemned by the way we participate in the story of Adam and Eve, how we have all participated in the rebellion. We have seen that God cannot tolerate sin. I believe this is in large part because God has created us for so much more. We are created to live in the very image of God, imago Dei and yet we have settled for so much less. We have settled for a lie and when we confess this lie through our lives as the ultimate truth in our lives, then we stand condemned, condemned by our own confession. Knowing that we cannot remove this condemnation, God judges humanity. But his act of judgment is as unbelievable as you can imagine. He endures our judgment. He takes it upon himself. He assumes our judgment and releases us from judgment if we would only receive this freedom for ourselves. God is just, and in this he shows his great justice and his great mercy. How can there be mercy without judgment?

When we place our faith in this judgment, then we say in theological terms that we have been justified. We have been made right. God's justice makes us right. This is the very heart and character of God's justice. Not judgment for punishment, but judgment to make things right. We have been made right through justice; we have been justified.

This work of justice has not ended with the work of the cross and with our decision(s) to follow and obey in faith. God is continually seeking to spread his justice. This is similar to how our salvation both begins now and will be completed at the end. Justice started with Jesus and will be completed at the end. In the meantime, God is seeking to make things right. He is seeking justice to be on the earth. He is seeking to end poverty. He is seeking to end human trafficking. He is seeking to end the reign of the evil one. He is seeking to bring people out of depression. He is seeking to bring healing to broken homes. He is seeking to tople the systems that keep people down and in systems of pain and trouble and sin. He is seeking for his word to go out and bring healing. For those in the far away places to be brought into relationship. This answers the question how can God be both good and judge. The bigger question is how could a non-judgment God be good? He is seeking justice. He is seeking to make the wrong things right. God is on mission, the mission of God, the missio Dei.

The question now is turned on us. How will you respond? You've been justified, you've been made right in his image. You've been made a new creation. God is on mission, will you join him? Will you realign your life so that your life reflects the mission of God. In your job, how will you join in God's mission to make things right? In your family, how will you join in God's mission to make things right? In your free time? How about this: in your finances? Does your finances look like someone who has been justified and is now being used by God to make things right?

Justice, part 1

Preaching this week on God's justice.

This can be a very difficult subject, but I think is something we need to re-claim as central to our theology. We speak of mercy and grace, and yet abandon justice. I think we are afraid of this subject. This is probably due to a few reasons, but the primary reason, I contend, is that we live in a culture where the chief virtue is individualism. The lasting legacy of the Enlightenment is the individual, and if we are to say that God stands above the individual then we are assaulting some central tenets to modern thought. What if the individual is not the chief being in our world? What if there are larger forces at work than my own pursuit of happiness? What if my actions actually have consequences on others? What if there is a God who sees all of the cosmos and will hold me accountable for the ways I have selfishly lived my life?

How do I reconcile these questions with the individualism that invades our culture?

more from Wright, again.

“The second feature of many communities both in the postindustrial West and in many of the poorer parts of the world is ugliness. True, some communities manage to sustain levels of art and music, often rooted in folk culture, which brings a richness even to the most poverty-stricken areas. But the shoulder-shrugging functionalism of postwar architecture, coupled with the passivity born of decades of television, has meant that for many people the world appears to offer little but bleak urban landscapes, on the one hand, and tawdry entertainment, on the other. And when people cease to be surrounded by beauty, they cease to hope. They internalize the message of their eyes and ears, the message that whispers that they are not worth very much, that they are in effect less than fully human.

To communities in danger of going that route, the message of new creation, of the beauty of the world that is yet to be- with part of that beauty being precisely the healing of the present anguish- comes as a surprising hope. Part of the role of the church in the past was- and could and should be again- to foster and sustain lives or beauty and aesthetic meaning at every level, from music making in the village pub to drama in the local primary school, from artists’ and photographers’ workshops to still-life painting classes, from symphony concerts to driftwood sculptures. The church, because it is the family that believes in hope for new creation, should be the place in every town and village where new creativity bursts forth for the whole community, pointing to the hope that, like all beauty, always comes as a surprise.”

more from Wright

From N.T. Wright's Surprised By Hope: Rethinking Heaven, The Resurrection, and The Mission of the Church:

"How can the church announce that God is God, that Jesus is Lord, that the powers of evil, corruption, and death itself have been defeated, and that God's new world has begun? Doesn't this seem laughable? Well, it would be if it wasn't happening. But if a church is...actively involved in in seeking justice in the world, both globally and locally, and if it's cheerfully celebrating God's good creation and its rescue from corruption in art and music, and if, in additon, its own internal life gives every sign that new creation is indeed happening, generating a new type of community- then suddenly the announcement makes a lot of sense."

I've been involved in the church my whole life. Most of the time when I read the Scripture and then look at how she is intended to be I see major disconnects. I see disconnects in the way I read Scripture and the realities of life. I see disconnects in the way the church treats the poor, the rich, the outsider, and the each other. It is hard to evangelize friends and family when they just bring up the church, and I really can't refute their frustrations with the way the church acts. However, I have this hope that it doesn't have to be like this. That the church can grow into the image of God. That we can love one another- not perfectly, but we can try. That we can care for those on the outside. That we can be responsible with our money and care for the poor and teach the rich how to be faithful with their status in life. Then when we announce the good news, there is a whole new level of authenticity and power.

Judgment

From Surprised by Hope by N.T. Wright regarding Jesus as the coming Judge,

The early Christians held on to a belief of Jesus as the judge even those in a liberal/postliberal worldview balk at this idea. For the early Christians the judgment of God was something to be celebrated. N.T. Wright writes, "In a world of systemic injustice, bullying, violence, arrogance, and oppression, the thought that there might come a day when the wicked are firmly put in their place and the poor and weak are given their due is the best news there can be. Faced with a world in rebellion, a world full of exploitation and wickedness, a good God must be a God of judgment."

It seems that these words can just as easily apply to our society. Yet, we can't imagine a God of judgment. I see maybe two reasons for this. One is that we have such an individualistic worldview that we have discounted the possibility of God acting in our world. God is not as supreme as the individual is. The other possibility is that those who reject the idea of God as judge are those who themselves will stand in judgment: those who benefit from systemic injustice, bullying, violence, arrogance, and oppression.

Sovereignty

This week at Asbury we are looking at God's Sovereignty, especially from Psalm 33. We read in the Psalm verses like,

"For the word of the LORD is right and true; he is faithful in all he does" (33:4)

"The LORD foils the plans of the nations; he thwarts the purposes of the peoples" (33:10)

"No king is saved by the size of his army; no warrior escapes by his great strength" (33:16)

These are just a few verses about God's sovereignty, about how God is active and alive in the world. About how God's words stand true despite anything that stand against his plans and purposes.

The thing about these verses is that I should whole heartedly get behind theses words. I should be stirred by the greatness of our God. The thing is, when I read these words I usually am left asking myself how much I really believe in this kind of concept. I tend to be a hyper-Arminian in terms of God's sovereignty. I tend to see the human involvement in life, and the human choice in the actions of the nations and the individuals. Theses verses are redirecting me to think through this concept a bit. God is working in the world. I've been told my entire life that life is what I make it. Success and failure ultimately depend on me and my ability. This is the American dream- the self-made man who only had pennies to his name then became the wealthy and the powerful. This is a lie according to the Biblical narrative. The truth is that God is active in the world, and for the blessings I experience or the failures I experience I need to look to God. The Psalm declares that no one is saved by the size of his army, the same is true for us in terms of our own "armies." Those things we set up as safeguards against destruction: wealth, education, possessions, etc. I am not saved by these things. Saved here is not the eternal kind of salvation like most evangelicals talk about. Saved in this Psalm is the more temporal salvation. The salvation from destruction. The salvation from misery. The salvation from torment and tyranny. Salvation is the blessings in life. No "army" is going to save me, only the LORD.

Glory

I'm preaching this weekend on God's glory. The main question that comes out of looking at God's glory is how do I bring glory to God. I've been giving this some thought for several years. In some ways, this question is answered by many that to give God glory I have to achieve something great. After all, greatness= glory. This is true in some ways. God's greatness is demonstrated in his glory. They are definitely linked. The glory of God is the weightiness of God's greatness. It is the magnitude of his being. It is the splendor of his love. It is the demonstration of his holiness. In the OT it is something that literally shows up: Ex 33, Is 6. This is true (in some ways) in the NT as well as in Matt 17.

However, in the NT something strange happens with the concept of glory. John 1:14 says, "The Word (the Son) became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth." This is remarkable. The glory of God is God in his finest, when he is surrounded by the heavenly chorus shouting "Hosanna in the highest....Holy is the Lord...The earth is full of his glory...Hallelujah..." And yet, John says that he, in eyewitness, language has seen, himself, the glory of God. The OT describes the glory in cloud like fashion. Yet John says, he has seen it! How has he seen it? The Word made his dwelling among us. He saw it in the life of Jesus. In the ordinary. He saw it in the flesh and blood of a person- in Jesus Christ, his friend. He saw the greatness of God expressed in a carpenter, who wandered around the countryside teaching and preaching. He saw the glory of God in the death of Jesus and in the resurrection. Jesus didn't walk around in a halo, but in Jesus is the image of the invisible God. In Jesus, is the true image of God's glory. In Jesus, is the image of what it means to glorify God- to humble yourself, even to the point of death...that God might rise you up. Humility leads to exaltation.

This example of what it means to glorify God is contrary to our thought that for me to glorify God means that I have to be some Superbowl champion. My wealth is not the glory God seeks. My victory is not the glory God seeks. My abilities are not the glory God seeks. Humility in the image of Jesus is the glory God seeks.

It reminds me of the story of Jim Ryun, one of my heroes. Ryun was the first high schooler to run under 4:00 min in the mile. He held the world record at 3:51 and was a three time Olympian. Ryun ran in the '64 Tokyo Games as an 18 year old. Then at age 22 he ran in Mexoco City in '68 and because of a sickness and lack of altitude training he got second. He gave up running and moved to CA, where through some friends at a Bible Study gave his heart to the Lord. He started running again because of his new found faith. He was going to work his way back into the Olympics so he could use his gifts in glory of God. He would run after that elusive gold medal and in his victory glorify God. However, he never really got the chance. In the prelims, he was tripped with an obvious foul by an unknown runner. He fell pretty early in the race, never able to make up the ground. Even though, he was the world record holder, he was not reinstated to the next round (not even the finals!). He walked away completely dejected. He was running now because of his faith. But he failed in bringing glory to God.

But we remember that it was in the humility of Christ that John saw God's glory. It was in the defeat that God came and really changed Ryun's life that he could see his own self-worth in the love of his Savior, not in his ability to accomplish. So, we ask the question what does it mean to glorify God? It means we follow the path of our Savior. Humility before exaltation. I'm going to accept what comes my way because I see a bigger picture than myself. I'm going to base my life on God's work in me, not on my ability to bring God glory. I'm going to choose the life of humility, the life of generosity, the life of the cross. And in this God is supremely glorified.

Get Smart

Saw Get Smart this weekend. I wasn't really wanting to see this movie, but it is Steve Carell so I thought I should give it a chance. The thing is I recently watched Evan Almighty on one of the free movie channels I get with my dish, and I had to redeem that movie from the awful acting and writing. The previews for Get Smart made the movie look pretty funny, and so my expectations were somewhat high, but nothing like they were for Indiana Jones. My friend, Lauren, says that you can tell how good a movie will be by how many trailers you see for it on tv. I've seen a lot for Get Smart. And by watching all these trailers I think I saw all the funny parts. There may have been a few other laughs that slipped in, but not many.

I wasn't hoping for this fresh comedy that I would experience from say Thank You for Smoking, but I was at least expecting to be entertained. I did pay $8.25 for a ticket. I was pretty disappointed though. At one point I had to go to the bathroom just to give myself a break. It wasn't just that I wasn't entertained, I was flat out bored! The jokes were predictable and not delivered with the same sharpness of Steve Carell that I've seen from 40 Year Old Virgin or Bruce Almighty, or even Anchorman. It was rough, and boring.

Captivity

This is the last and final week of the series from Kings. Kings ends in melancholy. The kingdom is destroyed and the promise of David seems to be forgotten. The Davidic king is sent into exile into a foreign land along with most of the people, and the promise of Abraham also seems to be forgotten. I read the story and I see zero hope in this story.

This is a troubling story. I've heard my whole life that God's plans are perfect and in him there is hope and peace, but when I read a story like this I begin to question those things I've always heard. Even knowing the rest of the story, how the nation lived in a downward spiral of increasing sin and deprivation, I am still left with question after question on why this happened. The really troubling part of this is that I can't be too harsh on the people of Judah or their kings because time after time in this series I've seen my own story. Solomon compromised; I compromise. Rehoboam's pride; Spencer's pride....etc. It makes me wonder about my own captivity and exile. It makes me wonder how I might incur God's judgment. Very troubling.

One thing I've been trying to grow in the last few years is seeing salvation in both temporal and eternal terms. My God saves me, and I believe he saves me now. He saves me from myself now. He saves me from sin now. Eternally this salvation will be complete, but I live into it now. This is a major shift from usual evangelical thinking that limits salvation to eternity only...salvation is only concerned with the soul. I take this from Wesley, salvation begins "at the first dawning of grace until the soul is consummated in glory" (my favorite Wesley quote).

If I believe this about salvation, then I need to also believe this conversely about judgment. Judgment is not only limited to the eternal. Hell is not the only manifestation of judgment. I believe we experience judgment now, which is why the Kings story is so troubling. I don't think this means cities are destroyed. I don't think Katrina or 9/11 was judgment from God. I do though resonate with Paul's understanding in Romans, "the wrath of God is being revealed from heaven against all the godlessness and wickedness of men who suppress the truth by their wickedness...for although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him...therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity."
Paul goes on later in Romans to talk about salvation in terms of captivity. We are held in captivity, or slavery, to sin until Christ brings us peace with God and makes us slaves to righteousness. In this light, I wonder what I may be in captivity to. I wonder if there are ways I have incurred God's judgment, the horrible judgment of being separated from him, of having my relationship with God estranged for any reason.

"But who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God- through Jesus Christ our Lord!" - Romans 7:24

Building Committee

This last week was the first service of the Venue68. Tom came in for a live sermon. He began his sermon giving credit to the building committee and the staff/volunteers who oversaw the completion of the buildings. As Tom was going through the names on the various committees, he asked people to stand to be recognized. Somewhat embarrassing was the fact that only a few of the building members were not in the service of almost a 1,000 people. Reflecting on that a little more though, this is a great testimony to Asbury that so few people were actually in the service. This reflects a community of people (mostly older) who have nothing personal to gain from the completion of the building. They will not benefit from this building. They will not experience the programs, the worship, the community. However, they saw the Kingdom growing through this building. Even though it did not involve them or benefit them they worked hard on building this building for others. This is living in the image of Christ, a selfless love for others and the Kingdom that transcends what you will get out of this.

Charlie Wilson's War

I watched Charlie Wilson's War this weekend. The more I watch Philip Seymour Hoffman, the more I think he is a genius. In this movie, he plays the best role for him an arrogant, angry, frustrated man trying to create great change in the world. The whole premise of the movie is wrapped up in a parable Hoffman tells to Tom Hanks character, Charlie Wilson. In a village in Japan there is a boy who while walking in the forest is attacked by a tiger. He barely lives and loses use of his legs. All of the towns people lament the tragedy and say the boy's life is over. The village Zen master simply replies, "We'll see." A few years later a war breaks out and all the men are recruited for the army. All the people begin to rejoice at this turn of event. Now the man will not have to go off to war. What a blessing, say all the people. The Zen master replies, "we'll see." The parable continues with tribulations and apparent blessings for a few more turns, each time the response is "we'll see."

This parable plays well into the point of the movie. Just because the effort to arm the Afghanistan's seems to have worked against the Soviets, we'll see on the success. I think this is a good word for Christians and the battles we march into. Sometimes, it seems the victories we experience lead to another challenge, and then without longterm eyes we think that challenge is the total downfall, but we'll see how that turns out. Speaking on legacy this Sunday, we need to remember the long term effect of each of our decisions.

The Frozen Donkey Wheel

Every season of LOST has ended with spectacular season finales. Season one was my favorite ending, even though it was not the best season. Walt being taken from Michael by the Others and the light in the hatch turning on was superb. TV doesn't get much better than that. Season two with the hatch blowing up and the final scene of Penny's crew in the arctic looking for the signal was also brilliant. Season three was great with Charlie becoming a martyr for the group and telling Desmond that the boat was not from Penny led to great suspense in the off months. However, I didn't think this season finale of LOST, The Frozen Donkey Wheel, led us with as much excitement as the others.

First of all, Ben had to move the Island by moving a frozen donkey wheel. Gob Bluth said it well, "Come on!" Then he simply disappeared in the North African desert where we already saw his story. It doesn't get too much cheasier than that. Of course Locke had to take over the Island, that was not a big surprise. The writers have been hinting at that since season 2, maybe even season 1. So, it was no real surprise that he would be the one in the coffin. The only real question is how did he get all this power over the Oceanic Six? Why are they so scared of him and won't even call him John Locke? This doesn't energize me the same way the previous season finales have.

Legacy

Sermon this week is on Legacy based on Hezekiah's end of life story found in 2 Kings 20. In short, the story of Hezekiah is that he shows off the royal treasury to an envoy from the "distant land" of Babylon. The prophet Isaiah then confronts him about his decision to show off the treasury by telling that now future generations will be taken captive and serve in the courts of Babylon. It is not certain whether this was in response to what Hezekiah did or because of another variable. But either way, Hezekiah replies in an unfortunately short-sighted response, "The word of the Lord you have spoken is good...will there not be peace and security in my lifetime?"

The issue of legacy in Hezekiah's life is disappointing. This is a king who has been faithful and is praised in the Scripture for tearing down the high places and being devoted to the LORD. He is faithful even when the Assyrians come against Judah. This is a man whose legacy should stretch into many generations. Hezekiah's legacy is then two-fold. On one hand, he somehow led to the exile by his foolish decision to show off his wealth. On the other hand, his legacy is shown in his child Manasseh who the Bible describes as sinful. Just one generation removed from Hezekiah the kingdom is again under the rule of sinful leaders.

Legacy is an important issue in the Bible. I think of the Old Testament that speaks of generations teaching future generations how to serve the LORD. Blessings stretch into the future because of a faithful generation; whereas cursing also stretches forward to future generations for sin. Psalm 145 says one generation will speak of the LORD to the next. Abraham's blessing doesn't fall on him, but on future generations. The kings of Judah reign because of David and the promise made to a man generations before their own rule. The words the patriarchs speak over their children determine how that generation will live. Generational issues are major theme in the Bible.

Even in our time, we struggle with understanding generational issues. The boomers don't like the WWII generation and vice versa. Generation X don't share the values of boomers. And then there are millinialists, like myself who see Xers as the silent generation that didn't fix the problems the boomers brought. But at the same time we hardly see the same tendency of individualism and materialism that the boomers taught us.

I find it impossible right now to think of the legacy I, and my generation, will leave because that is far removed from my thought process right now. But when I think about the future, I think about it in very pessimistic ways, which I think is a tendency of those my age. There are many things that look like they might just destroy our way of life: global warming, terrorism/ and war on terror, social security, massive national debt, massive personal debt of our parents, and a value system that we question in terms of individualism and materialism. What kind of legacy have we been left with?

I can't simply leave it with that though. I recognize that for the most part, we've been left a series of problems that is up to us to fix. In terms of the church, it is up to me and those my age, to re-imagine the church for a new generation that has not been exposed to her message of love and grace through Christ. In terms of the world, it is up to us to re-imagine what it is to live responsibly in the world. To live with justice and mercy in mind. To live in the image of Christ. The choice is up to us to step up to the plate and make a difference.

Facebook Church

I've been thinking lately about social networking website in terms of ministry, primarily my thoughts are social networking as a primary means of ministry. A few conversations in the last few weeks have prompted some of my thoughts.

First, talking to Todd Craig about college students away, he mentioned how some freshman have a hard time forming new relationships particularly in their second semester of school because their first semester they simply maintained previous relationships through Facebook. I didn't have that temptation, but I did notice that in my freshman year there were some who tended to struggle with isolation and lonliness and if a social networking site was available that would easily have replaced relationships within the new context.

Second, I met with a church member about using social networking to engage people outside of the Tulsa area. LifeChurch, for instance, uses Second Life. This person was pushing me to think of our new ministry, the Venue68, in broader terms of the Tulsa area.

Third, at Annual Conference a teen stood up during our Strategic Plan presentation to share about evangelism. She shared the importance of using Facebook in terms of evangelism, instead of home visitation, which is what most people were used to.

So, here's my confusing. On one hand, I am fully behind using Facebook/MySpace in terms of ministry because it is a way to speak the gospel in the common "vernacular." Missionary efforts always need to take into account speaking according to the local languages. When Europe was being evangelized a common debate between the East and West, among other things, was translating the Mass into the common vernacular for the new converts. The West held, until Vatican II, that Latin was the appropiate language, and that converts would need to learn Latin. Subsequently, people who could not read Latin had no access to the Bible. The Reformers rebelled against this idea, and many people were martyred because they sought to speak the gospel according to the common vernacular. So, as we move into a new era in the world, are we speaking in the common vernacular or forcing people to communicate in antiquated means?

On the other hand, the gospel is incarnational. God did not virtually become flesh. "The Word became flesh and dwelled among us." Furthermore, we remember the gospel through tangible means- we eat the bread and drink the wine, and are covered in actual water. In addition, Christian community, while universal, actually works on a local level with real people living in real ways, with real problems. Can you have Christian community via a social network?

Annual Conference

I've been in Annual Conference all this week. This has been referred to by Todd Craig as watching C-SPAN, which is about right. Annual Conference is the annual meeting of the United Methodist pastors and lay leaders in the Oklahoma Conference. It is considered the business meeting of the UM connection, but there is little business to be done, it is rather all reports on the status of various ministries in OK. I've sat through many, many 5-25 minute reports on the status of various things such as campus ministries, camping ministries, United Methodist Women/Men/Youth, committees on race and reconciliation, the Black church, the Hispanic church, the rural church...

Wesley called annual conference a means of grace, that is a way we encounter God's grace in our lives. He called this experience "holy conferencing." I can't imagine that our current practice is similar to Wesley's holy conferencing experiences. I don't feel refreshed by the annual conference experience, instead I tend to be put in a foul mood. Yet, there are many pastors and lay leaders who tend to love this experience.

Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull

I just got back from the latest Indiana Jones movie. This is the first movie I had seen in an opening weekend in a long time. I was so excited I even bought popcorn and a coke, two things I never do! The Indiana Jones trilogy has been one of my favorite movies of all time. I love the adventure, the humor, and the characters in all of the Indiana Jones (even the Temple of Doom). However, I walked out of this movie saying to Abby, "my childhood has been ruined!"

This movie had elements of the old movies, but none of the fun. I did laugh out loud a few times, and I did enjoy seeing the car chases- classic Indie movies, but the rest of the movie was a waste of time. Aliens!! Come on!

The woman was the same character from the Last Crusade. Harrison Ford struggled delivering lines, and he walked and looked like an old man. And in the end, Indiana gets married?!? I guess Indiana Jones is all grown up now, he is now Henry Jones and not Indiana Jones.

On top of it all, this movie was outrageous in the stunts- even for an Indiana Jones. Falling off the three waterfalls, running the duck off the cliff hitting the tree and then going into the river, barely escaping the ants... Come on! The old movies didn't go that far! On top of it, it was more believable because Harrison wasn't so stinkin' old.

Honesty

This week's sermon is on honesty. Looking at the story of Joash, the child king of Judah, who was a good king because he was raised by the priest Jehoiada. Tom made the sermon about honesty, and I had a hard time seeing honesty in the text. Instead, I saw mentoring.

So, I was thinking about honesty in the Bible. On one hand, I can take honesty to be a moralistic message on truth telling. Indeed, truth telling is important, but the truth is everyone lies at some point. If my wife looks bad, I tell her she looks good. If someone preaches a bad sermon, I tell them it was good. It is just natural to tell these little white lies. Is that sinful? Or is brutal honesty sinful? How do you speak the truth in love, as the Bible would say?

Then if I explore the Scripture about honesty I see some different ideas. In the prayer journal, there were two troubling stories. One was from the story of Joseph in Gen 42. This is the story of his reunion with his brothers. In this story, he frames Benjamin as lies about his identity. What do I learn about honesty from him here?

Then there is the very troubling passage from Luke 16. This is the parable of the shrewd manager who lies about how much people owe him, and Jesus commends him because Christians should be shrewd. Does this mean Christians should be dis-honest?

Then there is the prophetic and wisdom literature ideas on honesty, which is having balanced scales and treating people fairly.

I think the prophetic and wisdom lit. seems to hit the idea in the center. Honesty is essentially connected to living honesty. Does our confession, Jesus is Lord match our lives? Are we honest with this confession? Or rather is our life honest?

Yet another side of this is the the idea of truth vs. lie. Jesus is said to be the one who is truth in John 14:6 and furthermore truth is said to set us free once we know it. I think this happens on two levels. First, on a real practical level, living in ignorance is never free. Instead to live in ignorance is to enslave you to whatever idea it is. Maybe you don't know abestos is destructive, just because you don't know that doesn't make it not true. The same is true for our salvation. Just because you don't know the truth of Christ, doesn't make it not true. Just because you don't believe in God, doesn't mean God doesn't exist. So, when we come to the truth and put our trust in the One who is True, then we are set free from the deceptions that enslave us. Or rather, we are set free from the deceiver who enslaves us. We don't have to buy into the lie that our purpose is to serve ourselves and that happiness is the ultimate end in life. Rather, the truth sets us free to live in a new life free of the deception that lead us away from ultimate truth and ultimate meaning.

Moving Day?

Moving day was supposed to be on Tuesday, but nothing new has been done to the building. Hope to get in my by late next week.

Day With the Bishop

I spent most of yesterday with a group of new clergy and the Bishop of the Oklahoma Annual Conference, Bob Hayes. I can't say that I enjoyed myself. The thing about this meeting is that I continually struggle with the connectionalism of the United Methodist Church. I'm sure the Bishop and the cabinent saw this as a profitable time, but its not like I am building meaningful relationship. And on top if of all that, I see church ministry very differently than a lot of these people who are maintaining the organization. How do I network with people who have very little in common with me?

And yet at the exact same time, I love the connectionalism of the United Methodist Church. I love that every church will have a qualified pastor, maybe not effective, but qualified nonetheless. I love that if I ever really needed help, or just needed someone to cover for me, there is a DS or another pastor in town to help. I love the fact that I am accountable to someone, and everyone is accountable to each other. I love the fact that I cannot be fired from a church for upsetting people.

Yet, I don't seem to enjoy the connection...which leaves me thinking about what this relationship is really supposed to look like.

Free Grace and The Kite Runner

I'm preaching this week on Naaman's healing in 2 Kings 5. This is a story of Naaman, a great military leader, who even fights against Israel coming before Elisha in order to be healed. Two points emerge from this story. One is the universality of God's salvation. God is at work in the world, whether we acknowledge it or not. This has great implications for us.

Second, is the free nature of the healing he received. He comes bringing payment for his healing to pay the prophet. Prophets usually accepted payment for their work, such as Balaam. Elisha ends up turning his money away, which leads to next week on Greed. Naaman, because of his own greatness, expects Elisha to respond in greatness as well. I think he is expecting fanfare and fawning over Naaman. Instead, Elisha does not come out of his house and just sends a servant to talk to Naaman. He is told simply to go dip in the Jordan seven times and he will be healed. Strange.

He is upset by this, and I think it is because he expected some sort of magic trick that he would have to pay for and instead found an expression of grace that cost him nothing but some pride. I think the implications here are massive. The Msg offers this translation: "If the Prophet had asked you to do something hard and heroic, wouldn't you have done it? So, why not this simple wash and be clean?

How often do we make this so much harder than they really have to be? Naaman is looking for a way to make his healing justifiable through some hard work or through some payment of some money. Instead, Elisha evens the tables. If it were not so, then only those who could afford to be made well or who had the courage to do some daring task like a warrior would be made clean (or saved). Instead, Elisha makes it accessible to all.

In this he reminds me of Khaled Hosseini's book The Kite Runner. This is a book about the need to make his redemption justifiable. Hossein's main character is Amir. He is narrating the story of his life. He is born into privilege before the Soviet Union takes over Afghanistan. His father is wealthy and has a sevant and his servant has a son, Hasan. Amir and Hasan are best friends, even though they are not on equal terms. Hasan always has to serve Amir, even in their friendship. One day, Hasan and Amir get jumped by a gang in the street and Hasan offers himself in a daring move to distract the gang from grabbing Amir. In that shuffle, Amir is able to get away unnoticed and hide out of view. From his hideout, he sees a detestable act as Hasan is raped by this gang of teenage boys. Amir leaves and doesn't help Hasan at all. He doesn't even see his friend for several days. Then finally he sees him, but his relationship is ruined. Instead of being friends, they're relationship is now relegated to servant-master. Amir feels very guilty because he was too cowardly to help his friend, but his guilt just keeps driving them further and further apart. During all of this time, Hasan remains very faithful to Amir even though Amir keeps treating him worse and worse.

After awhile, the Soviets come into the nation and he and his father have to flee. They leave behind Hasan in Afghanistan because Amir accuses him of stealing so he won't have to go with them to Pakistan and then later to America. That one instance ends up defining both Hasan and Amir. Later in life, Amir is a grown man living in California with his wife and his demons from the past come back and end up driving him back to Afghanistan to make things better. He ends up having to be faced with some "hard and heroic" deeds in order to get rid of his guilt and his shame from the past.

In that story I hear Naaman's story. I hear my story. Now, to be sure God always wants us to be heroic in our pursuit of righteousness, but not to earn Christ's righteousness. I just know that for me, so much of life is lived with the idea that I need to do something heroic in order to find my redemption. I need to at least wash in a better river than I'm told. It can't be that God's grace and healing are free to me and only cost me my pride. Its impossible to believe that God could heal someone even like me simply by his word. Surely, I have to show my faith. Surely, I have to earn my redemption. Surely, I have to earn my healing. How could it be any other way?

Sacrements and Deacons

I heard today that Deacons in the United Methodist Church have been given sacramental authority by the General Conference. I'm not sure how I feel about this. On the one hand, the church has needed to respond to a changing understanding of the Deacon. Asbury, for instance, has deacons as associate pastors the same as elders. These deacons are even the leader of the worshiping congregation, but not the sacremental leader. Certain services at Asbury have had to bring in outside elder leadership. That doesn't make any sense. However, Asbury has also hired to additional elders so I think they have solved their problem.

The new understanding is that deacons can serve the sacraments in the absence of the elder with the consent of the Bishop in their appointed setting. Kind of confusing. Makes me wonder when that would ever be the case. Is this intended for agency work, because when else would an elder not be present in the life of the church?

This is a step in the right direction in getting the sacramental power outside of one order, however, I'm not sure it is defined clearly enough by the Discipline. Some people could manipulate that pretty easily and have a bunch of deacons and give them sacramental authority. However, most deacons understand that they have given up that authority to take that order because that order is not intended to lead the church through order or sacrament. It kind of makes me think it is just for agency work.

Renaissance Fair

This last Saturday, I spent a very strange afternoon at the Muskogee Renaissance Festival. Now, I was very hesitant on going to the fair, but Abby, Jason and Emily all wanted to go so I decided to not be a kill joy and take the trip out there to attend the Renaissance Festival. First of all, I was skeptical on the Renaissance culture in Muskogee, OK. I've driven through this town enough not to expect anything spectacular.

As we were driving into the parking lot, which was a grove of pine trees that surprised me because I was expecting a gravel parking lot, I noticed some of the people getting out of their minivans and pickups were actually dressed as middle ages people. The women were wearing long dresses, the men were in tights and carried swords. I thought it odd the actors would be arriving so late in the day.

Jason offered me a pair of sunglasses for the day. I turned them down because I was wearing a hat and didn't want to wear them. However, after I bought my ticket and saw how people were dressed I had to change my mind and go back and put on some dark sun glasses so I could stare at people because of their ridiculous outfits. I couldn't believe what people were wearing. As soon as we entered there were a bunch of women dressed as wenches or whores (not sure I know the difference). I couldn't believe how much cleavage they were showing. But it wasn't just them because everywhere I looked were women wanting to show off their bust in their wench dress.

We all walked through the "village" with a shocked jaw dropped expression on our face as we didn't talk to each other for a good five minutes. Instead we simply stared at the fake town being manned by the various characters. The thing was, it wasn't just the characters that were dressed up. Apparently, normal (or rather "normal") people were also dressed up in character even though they paid to get into the festival the same as us.

I couldn't believe my eyes all afternoon. I never did get used it. I was shocked by the bad English accents these Okies were trying to pull off. I was shocked by the lack of decency. I was shocked how these people had found themselves. I was left wondering how these people ever got into this. Here is the steps I propose:
1. attend Renaissance festival
2. return to Renaissance festival
3. purchase small piece of costume
4. speak in English accent
5. purchase full costume

I hope I never proceed past step 1.

Heritic

I've been reading Newbigin's The Gospel in a Pluralist Society. He wrote this on page 40:
"In a pre-Enlightenment society there are only a few heretics in the original sense of the word, that is to say, only a few people who make their own decisions about what to believe. For the vast majority faith is not a matter of personal decision: it is simply the acceptance of what
everybody accepts because it is obviously the case. There is no alternative and no personal
chose. By contrast, in a post-Enlightenment society we are all required to be heretics, we are all required to make a personal choice."

I like this imagery of heresy as describing the authority structure Christians need to appeal to in a post-Enlightenment society. He opens the chapter discussing how an argument based on the authority of the Church or the Bible is not a valid approach because it is making assumptions about other people that simply aren't true, namely that others value the authority of the Church and the Bible.

However, to engage in this culture, we need to develop the idea of heresy. Namely, why is our personal choice to follow the traditions laid out in the Bible or through the Church. I think this is the challenge of the modern church. How will we communicate the validity of the traditions we hold to, when those traditions are no longer a valuable source of authority in our culture.

This has massive implications. Evangelism, for instance, has long been thought of as getting people to assent to some doctrinal statements (i.e. virgin birth) . If people believe, in the sense of affirmation, that certain doctrines are true then we have been successful in the evangelistic activity of the church. This also drives our discipleship. Christian education is concerned about getting people to believe the same thing, instead of getting people to be somewhat heretical in the sense that they need to understand the truth behind the authority for themselves. This a challenging viewpoint, especially in a non-congregational church polity.

Confessions of a Young Elder

This came from a paper I wrote for my internship. With General Conference in full swing, I think it is appropriate to publish my grievances.

The United Methodist Church is overburdened in institutionalism. A quick look at the Book of Discipline will show the great institutionalism of the church. Many leaders I have come across are more concerned with the institution that they are concerned about the local churches that make up the institution or the actual people of the local churches that make up the institution. A district superintendent, for instance, told me of the process of making appointments. Three questions are asked with each appointment. First, is the appointment made for the good of the annual conference; second, is the appointment made for the good of the local church; third, is the appointment made for the good of the pastor. That is completely wrong. The annual conference question should be the last questions. The annual conference exists for the good of the church, not the church for the good of the annual conference. I wonder how I can spend my life supporting a church with such thinking.

One of the things I like about the United Methodist Church is the fact that we were founded based on the pragmatics of preaching the gospel, as opposed to a doctrinal system like so many other Protestant denominations. Early Methodist polity was simply about the best way to spread the good news. Now, we support a polity that hinders are spreading of the gospel. Why? Because we love our institution more than we love those who are Lord loves. Itinerancy, in our current form, does not help us in reaching new people, it simply helps us keep churches open that should otherwise close because they are not doing anything evangelistically and are not concerned about the gospel. I wonder how I can spend my life supporting a church with such thinking.

On to ordination. The ordination process is supremely concerned with supporting the institution. The reason the ordination process is so cumbersome is because the local church has given up her responsibility of raising up men and women who are called by God to invest their lives in vocational ministry. The local church has instead sent these men and women to seminaries far away from their local church and then asked the Board of Ordained Ministry to then evaluate them when they exit from their graduate theological training. The problem here is the zero investment of relationship. How is this living the gospel where there is no community investment? I was contacted rarely by my home conference, and never to care for me or offer me encouragement. The BOM is simply a way of forgoing the community of the redeemed that we call a church. The BOM is interested in finding men and women who can operate in a bureaucratic institution and then later on support that same institution. I wonder how I can spend my life supporting a church with such thinking.

Now that I have hashed out some of my grievances, I will move on to my anger. Much of my anger stems from a call I feel from God, and a lack of ability to carry that out with real integrity in this system. I see many clergy in the United Methodist Church with no creativity, and no zeal for Christ, and especially no zeal for preaching the life transforming message of salvation. I can’t believe they were always like this. I can’t believe they entered seminary with this cynicism and jaded outlook. Where did it come from? In my eyes and from my perspective, it looks like the church just beat the shit out of some of these pastors. I fear for my future when I see them. Never do I want to be in their shoes. If I stay in the connection long enough, then I imagine that I will feel like they feel.

In addition to the depressed pastors, I don’t see much willingness from conference leaders to engage young clergy, which infuriates me. The United Methodist Church is almost dead! If we would wake up and have a sense of desperation that finally welcomes the idea that we have no idea what we are doing as a denomination then maybe we can start to make some headway. We are not living in the 1960s when the church was a large institution with much sway. We are living in a society with no interest in the church. We are losing scores of young members because there is enough arrogance in the older generation that refuses to listen to the idea that maybe, just maybe, they don’t know what they are doing after all. The younger clergy, like myself, also might not know but we are willing to try. We haven’t been beat up yet, we have some optimism, some hope that Christ did in fact raise from the dead and in that we have hope that this message still has some power and can still transform a heart.

Preaching on defeat

One of my goals when I preach is to take an idea and think about how my audience would not have heard it preached like that before. Usually, that just means I do my homework and provide some exegesis and that satisfies my creativity and my desire for something fresh. So few pastors take the time to read and study.

So, this week, I'm preaching on Elijah in 1 Kings 19. I love the story of Elijah, but it is somewhat difficult to preach because there is just so much there. Following the prophets of Baal confrontation in chapter 18, Elijah hits the bottom. In the end of chapter 18 we see that he is curled up in a little ball unable to even look to see if the rainclouds are coming. One commentator says that he is in a state of intense prayer. I see him more like Rainman with his knees to his chest rocking back and forth trying shut out the world. Been there, done that. Also reminds me of Don Chafer song, Leave Me Alone on the album Luckiest Man on the Face of the Earth. The song lyrics:

Turn out the lights
Close the door
I’ll not be taking visitors anymore

Shut off the power
Take down the sign
And let the machine answer the line

CHORUS
Leave me alone
Not because I’m angry
Just because I need to hear myself breathe
And be alive
And wonder why she’s gone

Since I was a boy
Always her voice
Was ringing in the air around our home

How still the air
Winter is here
But missing is her warm familiar tone

It is a pretty powerful song about the death of his mom.

So, I see this story of Elijah and I hear this song playing. Melancholy. Depression. Despair. Defeat. Elijah has been enormously successful in his career, he singlehandedly confronted the prophets of Baal and the powerful King Ahab of the northern kingdom, and yet he is still depressed and still feels the need to run away. I don't really get that. I think he would be on cloud nine soaking up the affirmation of his success. If I read the chapter before (1 Kings 17) I read about how Elijah correctly prophesies a drought (which is an affront to Baal- the Phoenician storm god); how he flees but is fed by ravens; how he gives a woman an unending jar of oil and flour to make bread; and how he raises that woman's son from death. Then he goes on Mt. Carmel for the showdown, and wins. Pretty successful guy.

But then he changes. He has to flee once again and finds himself in a deep depression, and what I would describe as he feels defeated, which could be debated on whether or not he really is defeated. He then goes off into the desert and reenacts the Exodus story: runs into the desert, prays for death (Nm 11:5), is provided food, eats unleavened bread, goes to Mt. Horeb, goes into a cave and has a theophany (Ex 33). Sounds familiar, a little too familiar. It reminds me of how God has always been a savior, especially to those who are down and out.

Then comes the theophany. A mighty wind. An earthquake. A fire. YWHW is not in any of those forces of nature, those signs of judgment. Then comes the "sound of sheer silence." Oxymoron- sound of silence? Almost as if God is present even in absence. That's powerful!

If I think about Elijah's life, I am struck by how this experience came here in his life. Why did this powerful theophany occur here, and not in the "victorious" moments of his life? Not in the "wins." I'm not sure I understand that, except that it seems entirely consistent with Scripture.
God chose Israel. Weak. Little. Insignificant. Slave nation. Unfaithful. Israel. He didn't chose the "winners" in Egypt, he chose the losers in Israel. God came as flesh, Immanuel, in the darkest of times for the Hebrews. Not in times of independence and wealth, but while they were under the control of the most powerful empire ever. On top of that, Christ did not achieve our salvation through means of victory, but through means of defeat. Through destruction. Through death. Through obedience to authorities who had no authority over him. In this way he overcame death and sin. Victory was won through the strangest way. It was won through death and defeat. Victory was won in a way that makes me very uncomfortable.

Major implications to this. How can I align myself with the culture of winning? Our culture is bred to accomplish and overcome. Afterall, survival of the fittest. I must be the fittest in order to survive. I must be great an makes others weak. I must win at the expense of another. Even the way I understand God, better come through my winning, my achievement, my accomplishment to not sin or to glorify him with what I can do. I must be the champion in order to glorify God, or even to approach him. Can God accept me and be pleased with me, when I am defeated? When I am in despair? When I am depressed?

This is exactly what Elijah teaches. God comes to us when we are at the bottom. When we are hungry and not full. When we are weak and not strong. When we are humble and not proud. This is the gospel. This is the gospel that brings freedom and brings new life. That in him, my life is totally changed. The pressure of measuring up and "winning" is gone because in Christ my victory is won and now I don't have to wonder what to do when I am not victorious. Can the grace of God spread even to me?

Blind Spot

I remembered this story last week during my sermon on Wise Counsel.

After the ice storm, my car was left without a driver side mirror. I waited until after Christmas to get it fixed, and the day before it was scheduled to go in for the repair I was driving on 71st and Harvard and glanced over my shoulder but didn't see anyone so I started to change lanes. A large white Dodge pickup had been driving in my blind spot, which was even bigger because there was no mirror and I slammed my car in the side of his truck. It turned out to be an Asbury member and so I was hoping for some special treatment but I still had to pay my deductible.

OSU Campus Visit

We went to OSU three weeks ago on a campus visit. Going on this campus visit helped me to understand Asbury in a much better way. Asbury is a church that has invested heavily in student ministry, and it shows. These students have a heart for God, and a heart to serve God through missions. I heard story after story about students choosing to go overseas for the summer or the year after graduation to serve God in missions. I couldn't believe how ingrained it was in the students. My respect level sky-rocketed for the work of the student ministry at Asbury.

Jon Bon Jovi

Last night, Todd and I went on a campus visit to OU and on the way back met up with the Blagg who had free tickets to Jon Bon Jovi. Now, I am not a big Bon Jovi fan, but I can't pass up a free arena concert.

The whole experience was like I was stepping back in time. The guitarist looked like he was straight out of the 80s wearing a top hat and a long coat with tails. Bon Jovi was wearing a vest with nothing on underneath, and the sound was straight from I love the 80's.

I looked around the sea of people to see 16,000 40 year old men and women reliving their glory days as high schoolers. Many were rockin it out with Jon and making out and grooving with people around them. At one point Todd said to me that if I was around in ten years and ever saw him acting like that to quickly point out the ridiculousness of the action.

Liquor License

We went camping in Devil's Den this past weekend. Since we forgot to bring beer, Abby went into "town" to see if she could come up with some while I was setting up the tent in scattered rain. After over an hour she finally returned from West Fork, Arkansas empty handed. Turns out the beer couldn't be bought because the churches had bought up all the liquor licenses in that town. I don't know if that is even possible, but even the idea raises several points. First and most importantly, this is the classic case of Christ against culture. Normally this is done through political power. However, here it is done through the free market- capitalism at its best.
Furthermore, what a stand to take, churches! Good job on establishing the right standards.

Lent

From Churchmarketingsucks.com

We're playing telephone today: we got a link from the Cheapertising blog who highlighted the Got Religion blog who covered a story from the Telegraph. It takes a timely look at the season of Lent in the Netherlands, and a current re-branding that's under way. I'll quote:

"Dutch Catholics have re-branded the Lent fast as the 'Christian Ramadan' in an attempt to appeal to young people who are more likely to know about Islam than Christianity."

As the season of Lent has become less important for the Dutch over the past years, they feel something must be done. Martin Van der Kull, director of Vastenaktie, a Catholic charity, had this to say:

"The image of the Catholic Lent must be polished. The fact that we use a Muslim term is related to the fact that Ramadan is a better-known concept among young people than Lent."

Defining a Christian event in Muslim terms is a foreign concept, especially here in Protestant America. But thinking deeper, is it really so bad to explain Lent as a "Christian Ramadan?" It seems like at least a good way to communicate what happens during Lent to a non-Christian listener. Either way, it's sure an interesting way to market your church in a Muslim location, and it keeps with our international theme of late.

Prayer and Sex

from Prayer by Yancy p159

"I think prayer is analogous to sex. Most people would complain about their sex lives; a few do really well. Sex and prayer are intimate and over-glamorized relationships. We all are led to believe that we should be in the stratosphere in sex and in prayer. It sets up a false expectation. And breaks down intimacy.

Why Pray?

From Prayer by Yancy p56

Years ago, when I was beginning a writing career at Campus Life magazine, I used to discuss these problems with colleague Tim Stafford. He later wrote about them in his book. Knowing the Face of God, and I will simply quote him:

"Silently gazing into a friend's eyes may seem purer, and certainly more romantic, than mere talk. But conversation, not silence, builds relationships. Though I will never minimize the effect of beautiful eyes, I expect to talk to the people I care about- and to hear them talk back. We do not build relationships on a sentence or two spoken every few conversation between real friends is a constant stream.
So, I have a problem with God. I have never had a conversation with God; I have never heard his audible voice. Though I sometimes feel powerful religious emotions, I am cautious in interpreting my impulses and feelings as messages from God. I do not want to take the Lord's name in vain. i do not want to say, "The Lord told me," when in reality I heard a mental recording of my mother's voice. I have spent any number of hours talking to God, and he has not yet answered back in a voice that was undeniably his. "

Tim adds that he continues to pray, making requests of God and offering praise and worship, but questions persist. Why praise God who, unlike friends, does not need a lift? Why inform God of needs that God already knows about? Why thank God, who hardly needs a pat on the back?

"Some people say that we should pray not because God needs it, but because we need it. When we praise him, we remind ourselves of what is fundamentally important. When we thank him, we humbly remember our utter dependence on his care. When we pray for people, we are encouraged to then go out and do something to help them. From this perspective prayer is a self-help exercise.
No doubt prayer does these and other good things for me, but if they are the principle reasons for praying, my "personal relationship" is in trouble. Prayer that is only a useful exercise is not conversation. It is more like writing a diary, which is also good for you, but it is entirely private and one sided."

Married Prayer

Walter Wangerin Jr. tells of a time early in his marriage when he had committed some wrong against his wife, Thanne. Even though he was studying in seminary in hopes of becoming a pastor, he had always avoided praying aloud with her. It seemed too intimate, too personal an act. This time, with a riptide of guilt sweeping away his shyness, he agreed. They lay for a while side by side in bed, each waiting for the other to start. Walt began with a hymn like, formal prayer in the style he had learned in seminary. After a silence, he heard Thanne's simple, clear voice speaking humbly and conversationally to God about him, her husband. Listening to her, he began to weep. The guilt dissolved and he learned that humbling was no end in itself, but a necessary step to the healing.

Tempation

From Prayer by Yancy p30

A few years ago I received a letter from a reader I'll call Mark. He began,
I have suffered froma very serious emotional condition all of my adult life- borderliine
personality disorder- with the attendant depression, extereme anxiety, and debilitationg
physical symptoms. In way of explanation, and not blame, during the first years of my life I
was the subject of ver seriaous sexual and emotional abuse at the hands of my mother. Enough
said on that.

He went on to say that accounts in my books of inspiriting people only made him feel worse about himself.
I suppose my question is: what is the heavenly reward for those of us who are not laboring in God's fields in the inner city? Or who struggle daily with pornography, where a major
breakthrough is a day not on the Internet. Or who at the height of our recovery may have
maybe 10 percent of the moral character of the average unbeliever. Does one have to be a
healthy Christian servant to receive God's grace?

Aliens

From Prayer by Yancy

For several years I have tried to help a Japanese family, the Yokatas, in their desperate search for justice. In 1977 their thirteen- year old daughter Megumi vanished on her way home from badmitten pracitice. Police dogs tracked her scent to a nearby beach, but the distraught Yokatas had no clues that might explain their daughter's sudden disappearance.

Sixteen years later, long after the Yokatas had resigned themselves to Megumi's death, a North Korean defector made a stunning claim: a Japanese woman named Megumi was living in North Korea at a training institue for intellgenice agients. Scores of Japanese, he said, had been kidnapped and forced teach Korean spies the Japanese language and culture. He provided heartrending details of Megumi's abduction: agents had seized her, wrapped her in a straw mat, and rowed her to a waiting spy ship, where she had spent the night scratching against the hold with bloody fingers crying out for her mother.

For years North Korea dismissed all such reports. But in the face of mouonting pressure, Kim Jong-il himself at long last admitted to the abduction of 13 Japanese, including Megumi. Five returned to Japan, but North Koreans insisteted the other eight had died, including megumi who, they said, in 1993 had used a kimono to hang herself. Much information supplied by North Korea proved false, however, and the Yokatas refused to believe the reports of their daughter's death. All over Japan, prayer groups sprang up to support the abductees. Mrs. Yokata traveled across the globe in her quest for justice, becoming in the process one of the most familiar faces on Japanese media. Eventually she visited the oval office and told her story to President George W. Bush, who took up her cause.

In 2004, 27 years after the abduction, the North Koreans gave Megumi's parents three photos of their daughter. The most poignant taken just after her capture, shows her at age 13 still in her Japanese schoolgirls' uniform, looking unbearably forlorn. "We couldn't help crying when we saw the picture," her mother tearfully told reporters. Two other photos showed her as an adult, a woman in her 30s standing outdoors in a winter coat.

The Yokatas fondled the photos over and over, finding some solace in the fact that the later photos showed their daughter looking healthy and reasonably well cared for. They tried to imagine Megumi's life. Had she met with other abductees and conversed with them to keep from forgetting her mother tongue? What had helped her remember who she was? Had she tried to sneak a message back to them? Attempted an escape? What memories did she retain of her life in Japan, life as their daughter? How many times had Megumi looked toward the island of Japan and scoured newspapers of clues of her former house?

Angry God

After worship on Thursday, a girl came up to me a serious faith question on her mind. She couldn't have been older than 11. She said, "Hey, Spencer, can I ask you a question."
"Of course."
"I gave up sleeping with my stuffed animals for lent."
"Ok," I said with some surprise and hesitation on what she was going to ask me.
"But this weekend I'm having a sleep over and do you think God it would be ok if I slept with one?" So, now I'm wondering how to respond but I decide to engage this.
"Why would God not want you to sleep with them?"
"Because it will make him angry." Now my heart breaks because I see the conception of God in her mind. It is too similar to how I have seen God in my life.
"Why would God be angry with you?"
"Because it makes me happy to sleep with them."
"Does God not want you to be happy?" I ask, hopefully she will see the clear stupidity of that thought.
"Well, no God wants me to be happy...I think...that's a good question."
I see that she will clearly not come to this conclusion on her own so I go ahead and help her out.
"I think it is ok for you to sleep with your stuffed animals. God loves you and wants you to be happy. Giving something up isn't because God wants us to be miserable. God wants us to be happy and so you should go ahead and do this."

John Wesley

From a sermon on assurance:

Wesley was the leader of the revival that led to the Methodists. Wesley was born to two godly parents, one was even an Anglican priest. He grew up under the instruction of the church and under the testimony of God’s presence in the world.

He even decided to be a priest himself and went through all his studies and graduated from Oxford. Convinced by guilt, he even went on a mission trip to the wild frontier of America to this new place called Georgia, a slave colony that was surrounded by Native Americans. He thought he could surely convince them of the truth of Jesus Christ that he had heard time and time again in his studies and from his parents.

On the ship on the way over to America, he disciplined himself in order to be productive and acceptable to God. Here is what a typical day looked like as he was going over to America

4:00-5:00 am private prayer

5:00-7:00 am Bible study

7:00-8:00 breakfast

8:00-9:00 public prayer

9:00-12:00 German lesson

12:00-1:00 Met together to give an account of the morning

1:00-2:00 lunch

2:00-4:00 Reading

4:00-5:00 Evening prayer

5:00-6:00 dinner

6:00-7:00 Reading

7:00-8:00 Worship

8:00-9:00 Bible Study

9:00 sleep

During the journey he met a group of travelers from Germany that utterly amazed him. This difference was shown in their moment of crisis. As they were sailing across the Atlantic they were hit by a series of storms that Wesley calls hurricanes. Now, I went on a cruise a few years ago and our ship was huge. And the ship even had stabilizers the counter the weight and shifts of weight and waves, and I still felt ill from the constant rocking of ship, and we had nothing but calm weather. So, I then think what it would have been like to be in a small wooden ship with the creaking of the ship and the constant rolling of the waves, and the water breaking over on to the deck and I can’t imagine how miserable that would have been. How frightening that would have been.

Wesley described it like this, “during their service [that is, the Germans worship service] the sea

broke over, split the main-sail pieces, covered the ship, and poured in between the decks, as if the great deep had already swallowed us up. A terrible screaming began among the English. The Germans sung on. I asked one of them afterwards, “Were you not afraid?” He answered, “ I thank God, no.” I asked, “But were not your women and children afraid?” He replied, mildly, “No; our women and children are not afraid to die.”

So, John Wesley, the man who would one day lead a great revival found himself utterly afraid of his own death. He had lived his whole life in pursuit of salvation and when it came down to it, he learned that all of his pursuits had been in vain. Wesley couldn’t understand how these Germans could have such confidence in their salvation.

After a few days, the storm finally passed after damaging the ship in several places. Life got back to normal on the ship, but Wesley couldn’t shake the experience of the storm. So, he sought out the pastor of the Germans and had to ask him about this experience. Wesley wrote about it in his journal. He wrote,

I soon found what spirit he was of; and asked his advice with regard to my own conduct. He said, “my brother, I must first ask you one or two questions. Have you the witness within yourself? Does the Spirit of God bear witness with your spirit, that you are a child of God?” I was surprised, and knew not what to answer. He observed it, and asked, “Do you know Jesus Christ?” I paused, and said, “I know he is the Savior of the world.” “True,” replied he; “but do you know he has saved you?” I answered, “I hope he has died to save me.” He only added, “Do you know yourself?” I said, “I do.” But I fear they were vain words.

This experience with these German Christians continued to haunt him. Had he worked his whole life in vain? All of this discipline, all the hard work, had it led to anything because in the end he couldn’t answer with confidence the question of did he know Jesus Christ.

The ship finally came to port in Georgia, and John went ahead with his planned mission trip. His confidence was shaken though and he wondered how he could preach to others when he himself didn’t even know if he was saved. Little surprise then that his mission trip was a complete failure in his eyes.

He returned to England feeling like a failure and struggling with these questions of faith. He began to seek answers to his questions. He took three strategic steps to find answers. First he sought out those with the confidence he was looking for. Second, he decided to begin to pray for this confidence. Third, he renounced looking for holiness in what he did with his actions.

And a few months later he had this experience that he wrote about,

In the evening I went very unwillingly to a society in Aldersgate Street, where one was reading Luther’s preface to the Epistle to the Romans. About a quarter before nine, while he was describing the change which God works in the heart through faith in Christ, I felt my heart strangely warmed. I felt I did trust Christ, Christ alone for salvation: And an assurance was given me, that he had taken away my sins, even mine, and saved me from the law of sin and death.”