Confessions of a Young Elder

This came from a paper I wrote for my internship. With General Conference in full swing, I think it is appropriate to publish my grievances.

The United Methodist Church is overburdened in institutionalism. A quick look at the Book of Discipline will show the great institutionalism of the church. Many leaders I have come across are more concerned with the institution that they are concerned about the local churches that make up the institution or the actual people of the local churches that make up the institution. A district superintendent, for instance, told me of the process of making appointments. Three questions are asked with each appointment. First, is the appointment made for the good of the annual conference; second, is the appointment made for the good of the local church; third, is the appointment made for the good of the pastor. That is completely wrong. The annual conference question should be the last questions. The annual conference exists for the good of the church, not the church for the good of the annual conference. I wonder how I can spend my life supporting a church with such thinking.

One of the things I like about the United Methodist Church is the fact that we were founded based on the pragmatics of preaching the gospel, as opposed to a doctrinal system like so many other Protestant denominations. Early Methodist polity was simply about the best way to spread the good news. Now, we support a polity that hinders are spreading of the gospel. Why? Because we love our institution more than we love those who are Lord loves. Itinerancy, in our current form, does not help us in reaching new people, it simply helps us keep churches open that should otherwise close because they are not doing anything evangelistically and are not concerned about the gospel. I wonder how I can spend my life supporting a church with such thinking.

On to ordination. The ordination process is supremely concerned with supporting the institution. The reason the ordination process is so cumbersome is because the local church has given up her responsibility of raising up men and women who are called by God to invest their lives in vocational ministry. The local church has instead sent these men and women to seminaries far away from their local church and then asked the Board of Ordained Ministry to then evaluate them when they exit from their graduate theological training. The problem here is the zero investment of relationship. How is this living the gospel where there is no community investment? I was contacted rarely by my home conference, and never to care for me or offer me encouragement. The BOM is simply a way of forgoing the community of the redeemed that we call a church. The BOM is interested in finding men and women who can operate in a bureaucratic institution and then later on support that same institution. I wonder how I can spend my life supporting a church with such thinking.

Now that I have hashed out some of my grievances, I will move on to my anger. Much of my anger stems from a call I feel from God, and a lack of ability to carry that out with real integrity in this system. I see many clergy in the United Methodist Church with no creativity, and no zeal for Christ, and especially no zeal for preaching the life transforming message of salvation. I can’t believe they were always like this. I can’t believe they entered seminary with this cynicism and jaded outlook. Where did it come from? In my eyes and from my perspective, it looks like the church just beat the shit out of some of these pastors. I fear for my future when I see them. Never do I want to be in their shoes. If I stay in the connection long enough, then I imagine that I will feel like they feel.

In addition to the depressed pastors, I don’t see much willingness from conference leaders to engage young clergy, which infuriates me. The United Methodist Church is almost dead! If we would wake up and have a sense of desperation that finally welcomes the idea that we have no idea what we are doing as a denomination then maybe we can start to make some headway. We are not living in the 1960s when the church was a large institution with much sway. We are living in a society with no interest in the church. We are losing scores of young members because there is enough arrogance in the older generation that refuses to listen to the idea that maybe, just maybe, they don’t know what they are doing after all. The younger clergy, like myself, also might not know but we are willing to try. We haven’t been beat up yet, we have some optimism, some hope that Christ did in fact raise from the dead and in that we have hope that this message still has some power and can still transform a heart.